When It’s Time for Goodbyes

It’s never easy to let someone go…to say goodbye…and be on your own. We are never prepared for departures—needless to say, a permanent one at that. No matter how much you know that it’s going to be the end, or when someone says it’s gonna be okay if it ever ends…still, watching people go remains to be heartbreaking. It’s like watching someone walk away with their backs on you, and you know that you’re never gonna see their faces again…only memories will remain.

Someone once said that it’s not on how people died that we should remember, but on how people lived. Upon watching the movie, My Sister’s Keeper, Anna’s last words before the closing credits bore a significant message to me. She said, “Once upon a time, I thought I was put on earth to save my sister. In the end, I couldn’t do it. I realized now, that wasn’t the point…the point was I had a sister. She was fantastic!” Beginnings and endings are just part of the story…how we were born, or how we’ll ever die is just part of life. What matters is that, we lived.

The movie was about Kate Fitzgerald who was diagnosed with Leukemia…or should I say about Anna Fitzgerald—her sister’s keeper…or maybe both. When Kate was first diagnosed, her doctor advised her parents that she needed a match to save her life. Anna was genetically conceived to be her match. All of Anna’s life, she has been donating her parts to her sister—from the moment she was born, for eleven years. She has been giving Kate her blood, granulocytes, bone marrows, etc. until one day she came to a lawyer and said she no longer wanted to give any of her parts to her sister…even if she knows it could kill Kate. She said, she wanted control over her own body and wanted a “medical emancipation”—or is it really? Anna knew she was born for a reason…and that is to save her sister’s life. I guess all of us were put on earth for a reason too. There are no coincidences, nor accidents in life. Maybe the only difference is that Anna knew it too soon unlike the rest of us.

Kate—she was so young when she learned that her life is on the edge of a cliff. Yet, she battled it through and stayed a little bit longer. She saw her sister grow and Anna watched over her and took care of her. She fell in love with a fellow patient, and felt broken too when he died without saying goodbye after their prom. She’s still alive but dead was lurking over her life…and her family too. Her mom has been taking care of her, staying by her side all the time, and gave up everything to fight the battle with her. I could say the same for her dad, and brother, and sister, and the rest of their family. I wonder what it feels like seeing your family like that—doing everything to make you feel better…to somehow make everything seem normal even if everyone knows it isn’t…or at least make everything okay. Kate has been fighting for her life…but everyone gets tired along the way, including her. But she couldn’t seem to give up—for her mom, for her family.

It was Kate who asked Anna to go to the lawyer. It turned out that she no longer wanted to have any more surgeries. She wanted to free Anna and allow her to live a life outside the shadows of being her sister’s life-saver. That was the last thing she asked from her sister.

Kate died. Her last wish was to see the beach…to be with her family at the beach. It was the moment in the movie wherein you’ll realize how bitterly sweet life could be. She had a wonderful family…she has been given all the love that somehow made her life a little bit longer…and happy…but that’s it. In the end, when your time is up, you have to go. She died with the last person on her side—her mom. They had to let go, and move forward.

Someone once asked, “What will you do today if you know you’re going to die tomorrow?” In Paulo Coelho’s The Alchemist he said, “To die tomorrow was no worse than dying on any other day” so why does the last day be any different from the rest? Make your life count, even when your days are numbered… live each day like it’s your last…because in the end, you’ll never know when it’s time…you’ll never know when it’s the last. Dying is always scary…and the hardest part is leaving the people you love behind...but the best part is, knowing you made a difference in someone else’s life while you’re alive. 

My Sister's Keeper is a 2009 American drama film directed by Nick Cassavetes. Based on Jodi Picoult's novel.

Film released on June 26, 2009.

Cast:

Cameron Diaz as Sara Fitzgerald

Alec Baldwin as Campbell Alexander

Abigail Breslin as Anna Fitzgerald

Sofia Vassilieva as Kate Fitzgerald

Jason Patric as Brian Fitzgerald

Evan Ellingson as Jesse Fitzgerald

Heather Wahlquist as Aunt Kelly

Luke Wilson as Edward Alexander

Elizabeth Daily as Nurse Susan

Lin Shaye as Nurse Adele

Joan Cusack as Judge De Salvo

Thomas Dekker as Taylor Ambrose

Jeffrey Markle as Dr. Wayne

Emily Deschanel as Dr. Farquad

Amit Khanduja as Chief Surgeon

Olivia Hancock as Young Kate Fitzgerald

Eat. Pray. HAPPY BIRTHDAY

September 19, 2011; 12:03 am

In the first minutes of September 19, my 21^st birthday, I decided to watch Eat Pray Love. In the first couple of minutes of the film, I felt like being in the same ground as Liz Gilbert (Julia Roberts)—except not yet married of course; wanna travel the world yes, and most importantly being in that position wherein you barely know what to do in your life. For the first time, I actually wish for a multiple-choice-type of decision making, wherein you just got to choose which path you prefer from a to c, then just deal with the consequences later than being stuck with this kind of situation—no choices whatsoever. So much for 21 years: 16 of it spent in school, 2 years learning to walk, 3 to speak 300 words, then BUMMER!! Happy Birthday to me!!!

Life is full of choices, of decisions to make—that, I learned and still learning every day.  The difficult part though is—choosing. But today, I decide to be happy. I decide to smile. I decide to pray…to just lift it up to Him and surrender. The way I did in those 3 months before taking the board exam. I pray, “Lord, if it is your will, may your will be done”. Now, I’d still utter the same words before Him, “Lord whatever you decide my life would be, unto your hands I entrust my spirit. I know you know best, and I’ll try to do better.” When I wake up the following morning, I’ll smile and say “21 years have passed, another 21 years or so in the making…and it’s gonna be a blast.”—that is a decision I’d be making today. And tomorrow is the first day to start living with that decision.

Life is not a multiple choice type, but an essay. Each day you try to find the words to describe what your day has been…and after some time, when we go back and read those words again, there you’ll see how you were able to spend your life. Is it memorable? Is it happy? Are you more happy than sad? Were you hurt? How many times you’ve cried? How many scars have faded in the view? Were you able to stand after a fall? Were you able to learn through it all? Life isn’t simple—it’s just life. When I read those words I’ve written in the past, I’d seen that my life has been pretty simple; not complicated, not vague, just simple…I don’t wanna call it boring—just maybe, undemanding. But for the next jolt it’s not gonna be easy and I’ve got to take it seriously…because if I don’t, I might just end up clicking the ‘refresh’ button of my life and start over again—just like Liz Gilbert…but that’s her…and it’s not gonna be me. 21 years from now, when I look back, I wanted to tell myself “Oh yeah, that has been my life! Crazy and fulfilled life.” –and not a bitchy, crappy life.

Julia Roberts as Liz Gilbert (Eat Pray Love)

If there is anything I learned from Liz Gilbert, it is to not be afraid of life…of choices we make…and the consequences it might intake… we all travel along individual paths, and we sometimes encounter people along the way—people we meet become our teachers. That’s how I learn. I don’t experience everything in life there is, but through these people I came across with…I learned.

Life…a free-falling ride…just go with it :))

—3:37 am

CONFESSIONS OF A MOVIE-HOLIC

Favorite Movie
photo credits: weheartit.com

10 THINGS I HATE ABOUT THE MOVIES

1.       I hate it that those movies make us look like a psycho-freak. One moment they make us laugh, then the next thing you know, you’re sniffing and trying to conceal your tears so that your friends (or your mom or sister or brother) won’t make fun of you.

2.       I hate it that those movies makes me a couch-potato, and never accomplishes anything for the day…because I would rather listen to Adam Sandler sing than to hear my mom bellow for me to wash the dishes.

3.       I hate it that I gain weight just by having a 2-day movie marathon. Like, I consume packs of junk foods for a 16-hour movie. And for the record, I really don’t get the chance to burn those calories for just sitting around while making a list of movies-to-watch-next.

4.       I hate it that it keeps me awake at night (and on the wee hours of the day). How could you possibly sleep when you just saw Ashton Kutcher or Ben Affleck strip?! They would haunt you in your dreams, you know!

5.       I hate it that it makes me greedy. I wanna have my own friggin’ cars like those that O’Connor and Toretto drives—or just my own Paul-Walker-driver would be fine.

6.       It makes me dim-witted (a.k.a. slow) sometimes. Take for example the movie Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. I saw it and I know that it’s really a nice movie, but I was just dumbfounded by the fact that I never really understood why the guy has to forget his memories about his girlfriend. I guess I have to see it the second time because I really have to justify what I told my friend when she asked me if it’s really a good movie—I told her “yeah, it’s really beautiful and it made me cry”—I felt stupid for saying that because I don’t even know why I said that…plus I don’t even remember why even I cried when I saw that film.

7.       I hate it that it makes me forget my age sometimes. Because I’d rather watch Ice Age and Alvin and the Chipmunks than Final Destination and Saw (even though I used to love FD 1-4). Seriously, my 9-year old brother bought a DVD of Final Destination 1-5 while I was waiting for Kung Fu Panda 1&2 to be downloaded…and when I told him the list of animated movies I have, he just shrugged me off!!!

8.       I hate it that it makes me believe in Prince Charming—like I imagined my sister kissing that frog which keeps on coming back near our kitchen door and transform him into a gorgeous prince and live happily-ever-after (of course I would like my sister to go first in case that frog would turn into an ogre instead of a prince…like a trial-and-error thing).

9.       I hate it that it made me jealous. Like Jennifer Garner marrying Ben Affleck, or Angelina Jolie becoming Mrs. Pitt (though I would prefer a better last name than that) or Vanessa Hudgens kissing Alex Pettyfer, or Cameron Diaz kissing Jude Law, or Drew Barrymore kissing Hugh Grant, or Ben Chaplin kissing Ben Barnes (—that was pretty disgusting by the way, that I have to close my eyes because I was so hurt how my Prince Caspian had to kiss Basil Hallward for a freakin’ narcissistic Dorian Gray who prefers to stay young! *awful*)

10.   I hate it that despite all those things, I still love to watch movies because it makes me and my friends get together and bond…it’s one thing my father and I had in common…it’s makes me forget my frustrations and fears even for a moment…it makes me laugh when I’m sad and keeps me company when I’m alone…and most of all, those movies helped me get back to writing—like what I did just now!

POSTSCRIPT

There’s more actually, but it says only 10…besides, I’d hate to change the title in (More than 10) Things I Hate About Movies.

So, what do you hate about movies?

CONFESSIONS OF A MOVIE-HOLIC (On Romance Part I)

photo credits: weheartit.com

Your Love Story

There are different ways to portray a love-so-strong-it-could-withstand-the-storm sort-of type of stories. You could use the element of time to prove your point that love can stand the test of time, or distance maybe for which makes the heart grow fonder…or the royalties—prince and princesses falling in love with commoners. You could also use ghosts which haunts their loved ones due to their unfinished business and it leaves you guessing if that ghost would invade another human body so that they could still be together (or it was just me who guessed that way), or if the other love one would just die so that they could be together in heaven. Angels have also come down from heaven to fall in love. Speaking of mystical creatures, there are vampires falling in love with human, human falling in love with werewolves, or werewolves falling in love with vampires…and vice versa—which goes to say that love has no boundaries…anyone could love anyone…that love could break the rules—even the rules of the world we’re not even sure exists—like the Neverland, maybe. Furthermore, love stories could already exist or be based in the typical (sometimes monotonous, for some boring) day-to-day and realistic routines in life. Take these for example:

ü  Best friends end up falling for each other. Like, you end up falling in love with your best friend and your best friend falls for someone else, but in the end of the story you still end up with each other. Who the hell knows how that turned out to be?!—well, as you may know, there are ways: one, the best friend whom you fall in love with, who you thought has fallen for someone else, is actually in love with you…you’re just too dumb to ever notice; two, that best friend of yours realizes that you’re the one all along, and that best friend of yours is just kinda stupid for not knowing early on; three, your best friend just made you thought that you’re better off as friends but is actually secretly in love with you, and there goes the confessions of your secret love; (and maybe there’s a whole lot more to that type of story)

ü  Best friend falls for their best friend and ends up being just the best friend but the bestest-best-friend of the whole damn world!

(In my opinion, the best-friend-thing-sort-of excuse is really absurd…if your best friend is from the opposite sex, there is always the danger of one falling for the other…only one of the two things will happen: it would either ruin your friendship or you would eventually end up with each other…but truth is, it actually happens in real life and not just in movies!)

ü  A stranger meets a stranger. (I guess that’s also a typical—and generally the most popular—start for any love stories in movies…aside, of course if you’re best friends or simply friends, maybe). Either, a dog-and-cat type of a meeting where one is pissed with the other, but as the saying goes: the more you hate the more you love; or, when the two met, flirts with each other early on—then of course, falls in love in the end.

ü  Typical high school flicks: popular kid falls in love with the unpopular, like a geek/nerd/weird (or with a complete psycho) kid in school. Then the other kid becomes popular as well, then goodbye to the old-lonesome life (—seriously, that provides a better catch than popular kid succumbs to geeky/nerdy/weirdo-type of life).

ü  Rebellious kid softens as he/she falls in love with the kinder and decent one and eventually changes for the better. (As love becomes a sort of excuse for being a better person. So, if one isn’t in love, one isn’t better??)

ü  Broken-hearted, then finds somebody to heal their broken heart. (How to become broken-hearted: One, your best friend falls in love with your girlfriend/boyfriend then leaves you; two, your boyfriend/girlfriend cheated on you by snogging/sleeping with someone else; three, you just got played on by jocks/jerks/total assholes; four, bf/gf simply falls out of love or just got tired (or bored) with your relationship; fifth, bf/gf was never really in love with you…he/she just thought they are. But don’t worry because falling in love again is the best remedy for a broken heart—just don’t go breakin’ it over and over again)

ü  Never really had a good relationship so far…goes searching for love…then finds out that the one they’ve been searching for was right there beside them all along.

ü  Finds love in the most strangest of places with the most unlikely person. (In a story where soul-mates, Destiny, and serendipity exists)

There’s more to that list…indeed because those stories were based in real life. We also have our own love stories to tell. Probably, that’s the great thing in movies: it becomes a reflection of our lives. Sometimes we’re not even aware of it—that love is right there with us that goes unnoticed—then there comes this movie on which we can relate on…which we can say to ourselves “I know how that feels” because it’s there…because it’s true. That love exists—it exists in all spectrums of life, in both sides of the coin, in the corners of our world (I don’t care if the world is round!), night and day, rain or shine, in war or in peace, good or bad, heaven and hell, sun and moon—it’s everywhere! And there are different ways to tell great stories of love. Maybe that’s why we never run out of movies. There is always this movie which will bring us tears, joy, inspiration, and sometimes strength to pursue that love. And when watching movies, it makes us believe that true love exists…and sometimes, it also tells us that not all great love stories ends in a happy note…that not great endings has to start with a great beginning…or that not all stories even begins—some ends right before it starts. Sometimes it teaches us valuable lessons on love—and life in general. Love—can make or break a life, heal or mend the broken, become one’s strength or weakness…and that love is sometimes, all a person has.

POSTSCRIPT:

Everyone is a story-teller…everyone has a story to tell.

So, what’s your love story? 

CONFESSIONS OF A MOVIE-HOLIC (On Romance Part II)

photo credits: weheartit.com

The Great Finales

I’ve seen a load of movies already—of different kinds, but more of the love stories type. As I make a new list of to-watch-for-movies, I realize that I grew tired of watching predictable ones. There are only two kinds of movies—the one who’ll end with the happily-ever-after part, just like the fairytales, and the other one which ends in tragedy. The former makes you believe in love and its power to defile hardships and impediments, while the latter usually leaves an impression that some things are simply not meant to be. Oh well, as a movie-addict myself, I love great stories and happy endings…but it’s usually those stories which leaves you hanging, depressed, mad, and really sad are the ones which would stick in your memory and the one that usually stands out. Take for example my top 3 favorite movies of all time: A Walk to Remember tops my list, followed by the ever famous Titanic, and then the movie If Only. If there’s one thing in common among them, it’s the fact that these movies really made me cry—not just sob, but really cry!—and the endings of these movies have haunted me for quite some time thinking, “why couldn’t they just be together?!” well, talk about hopeless romantic thinking that all great love stories always end up just like the fairytales. Of course I grew up, and now it’s different—from watching those tragic movies, I’ve learned something about love: I’ve learned that the depth of a great love cannot be measured by how well it ended—but on how the great love story’s intricate parts were weaved into beautiful and magnificent masterpiece which we would love and cherish for its beauty as a whole. It’s not about the spectacular beginning or the great finale of a love story that truly matters, but on the breathtaking and unforgettable plot of the story itself. It’s not about someone’s death in the end, but on how love actually made them alive.

POSTSCRIPT:

How I turn a tragic ending into an unforgettable happy ending: treasure the moments of the story which made me smile…made me believe in true love, in the beauty of life, and the story of forever. 

Crazy Little Thing called Love (aka First Love) Trailer High Quality

This Thai movie stars Mario Mauer (P'Shone) and Fern (I guess that's her name...i apologize coz I suck with doing research). Anyway, upon watching this movie, it reminded me of the American movie counterpart...FLIPPED... The story goes by the same theme... A naive girl falls in love with the popular guy (and a very good looking one)...girl is a wallflower then becomes the unexpected princess...guys falls in love with the girl in the end, and story hangs in there. this Thai movie though, is funnier, and at the end of the story guy turns out to be secretly in love with girl all along. P'nam (Fern) confesses her love, they got separated, then met again after 9 years. In Flipped, girl and boy were neighbors...girl expresses her admiration with the guy from the start, but guy ignores her...then day comes when the guy finally realized that he, too, is in love with the girl, but apparently girl becomes uninterested with him already...so now, he has to work hard to win the girl, thanks to that sycamore tree which made a bridge of opportunity to lit another spark for them.

These stories of unrequitted love were born in a very young age, until it grew and blossomed into somethng wonderful and pleasant to share. What is love anyway?? Well, I guess it takes different forms, and makes up a beautiful story and brings about beautiful characters...some people go crazy about it, becomes stupid becomes ecstatic, and most of the time, brings out the best in anyone. That-love-thing...it can break a heart, but still the best remedy for one. It's workings, no one can quite understand, unless felt and shared..