EVERYBODY NEEDS SOMEBODY

photo credits: DeviantArt

There are these struggles in a person’s life that nobody else knows about. And it’s the fact of not knowing what it is that makes people feel alone sometimes. It’s the feeling of being empty and alone in a journey without any strike of light even at far.

There are times when you’re hurt too much that you don’t know what else to say… you don’t know what’s there to feel. It’s like you’re too numb to ever feel the pain. Either it’s by choice not to feel, or it’s just too much that even your body can’t endure.

When it rains, it pours…but sometimes, when it rains, it’s cold. Some people love to watch the rain from their windows. It’s got this sense of tranquility. It’s like the sky is crying for you because your eyes are empty with tears. Just like a heart that’s void of emotions. The cold from within reflects the cold from the outside.

The songs you hear and listen to, are mere echoes of the real melody and words that some hearts long to say. When you hear them from others’ lips through their songs, you feel fine, because you know that somehow, you share the same feelings with somebody else.

When you watch movies, you cry. It’s like you know what they’re going through, and you know how it feels the way they feel. They are mirrors of the real world and they reflect the sentiments that are vastly true and vague.

Everybody needs somebody…
Somebody to lean on to and sit beside you when all you ever wanted is to cry… Someone who can stay with you and listen to your muffled sighs… That person whose warmth can ease your numb soul and cold heart…The one whose gonna sing what your heart longs to hear, and show to you what a beautiful world there is to see.

Life is subtle and imperfect. Sometimes empty, sometimes gray. It’s amazing how one can see the meaning of life through the eyes of someone else…someone you care for and cares back. How can an ordinary person make you feel fine deep within. How an eventful moment can change the colors that you see. How a void empty space can be filled by someone just by sticking around.

Happiness is alive when shared with somebody else. Sadness only happens when you’re by yourself. Everybody needs somebody to share their happiness with… and be able to share with you their own happiness. Someone…who can share a piece of their own world with you…and that’s when you realize that you’re no longer alone.

Everybody needs somebody…to feel...to live…to be free…and be happy.

ANOTHER SCAR

Source: imakeityours.tumblr.com

Softly, Quietly
    the cool wind blew away
the remnants of a dark-colored day
like the grey sky on a sad mournful night
Nowhere to be found,
    Fallen out of sight

Horrid, Morbid
    Were the brawling of words
Stabbing the chest like double-edged swords
Like the restless strong winds & the stormy sky
Leaves nothing in the darkness,
even a sigh

Stranded, Undaunted
    was a heart in a melancholic summer
lonely and torn among the rustic infamous dagger
Like a lifeless fallen leaf in an auburn daytime hour
Reminiscent of those days,
    Like a scornful banter

Tormenting, Learning
    Once have been broken and tattered
Sewn together by time and improved character
Neither weak nor devastated
‘Cause this scar has been a memento,
of courage and mirth

WORDS IN INK

Words by with-accusing-eyes (words can mean anything, but in the end, they mean nothing at all) from deviantart.com

“I know that what other people think are not so important as knowing, that the ones in your life you care the most sees your heart in a way that doesn’t need for words.”

Writing is the only way I could pour my heart and soul into. It is the only way in which I could explain myself—why am I like this and that, and what do I really want in my life—and the way with which I always come up with an understanding of my own self. It’s a reflection…a mirror of some sort. This, I realized, is the thing I love doing the most. It’s a gift God has given me to nurture. It’s the only way I could let others look into my heart. I always hate being judged for whom I’m not, and I wanted them to know what lies beneath this skin. Words, I’ve come to discern, aren’t always enough to express, but strong enough to leave an impression. I know that what other people think are not so important as knowing, that the ones in your life you care the most sees your heart in a way that doesn’t need for words. Maybe, it’s one of the best things about family and friends—to let them know you even without telling them. Not everyone knows, though. And I’d like to think that I could reach them with my printed words. This is my world, and I realized that only very few have come into it.

VANISH

Disclaimer: photo not mine.

I’m starting to shiver

In this cold quiet ground

Waiting for my hero’s return

To savage my heart’s frozen sound

The heartbeat’s gone

The sun is down

The stars hide

Behind the cloud’s silhouette blinds

The darkness envelope

The misty eyes of love

Behind a river flows

Lost in an ocean’s ghost

I start to shiver

In this lost heart of mine

Deep in a river of sorrow

In the vast lonely night

I cuddle myself for life

While my thoughts linger behind

Why have you deserted me?

Am I not worth the fight?

WHERE ARE THEY NOW?

Sometimes, the people we’ve come to know don’t always stay as they are…and the friends we knew all along are not fated to stay on our sides forever…the promises that were once made are almost always…forgotten.

People change ‘cause they have to, or need to…or maybe, they just wanted to change. It’s not always that the people you’ve come to know remain unchanged all their life. It is part of the life cycle that we undergo metamorphosis. But the hard part is, to accept those changes and to come friends with yet another stranger.

STRAINED

Running… scared… lost…

Where would you choose to be when there is nothing else but darkness…
When everything is unclear, and you doubt the path you take?
Would you run away, or go further your way… until you see a light along your astray?
Do you doubt your strength and character? And believe that you deserve something better? Or just trust your intuitions, that everything’s gonna be okay?
How would change your life when it haven’t even started yet? How do you cope, when the only person there is in front is the image of your self?

I know I’m not that strong. Not even half of others think. I just go on with my life like day-to-day ordinary person, who is supposed to live up to someone else’s expectations. I have come to think, that people really get disappointed when the person they thought they know suddenly becomes a stranger. When the person they look up to suddenly becomes a disappointment. Not even knowing, that the person they know all their life, is not all person that she is. There are dimensions to her character that not everyone is aware of. And when it comes out, they can’t like it…because it wasn’t someone they first came to know.

I am lost in this bewilderment. Not been able to identify my identity. Sometimes I know, sometimes I don’t… but most times, scared… when I look in the mirror, I see a person who is struggling… trying to laugh everyday… and take off those skeletons hiding along in the closet. But they are still there… haunting my eyes like hell. A person who is trying to be strong, walking the streets like there is nothing wrong.

I am weak, I know. Cause I carry everything upon my shoulders. Meek and mute. Not finding the courage to shout and tell everybody that “Hey! This is me—a crappy little bitch in a mask of a friend, a daughter, a sister, a stranger—a complete mess underneath it all!” A person trying to find herself… A person trying to fix herself… It’s not okay everyday… Life sucks by the way… yet I still choose to walk on my shoes…to pretend that I am good.

I wanted to be different. I wanted to find the core of my existence. I wanted to be me. I just wanted to be happy and free. Is that too much to ask?

How can I move on with my life, when I don’t even know where I’m going? I don’t even know how to be happy with what I’m doing! All there is to do is to finish what I started—to finish strong and undefeated.

Lord knows, I am trying with all my heart. I am doing my best to go on with all these. I smile with strangers and acquaintances…laugh with friends and buddies… trying to find some warmth and melt the coldness inside. The busyness of each day takes all these dilemmas into oblivion. But when the night sets in, reality butts in and I am alone again…having these thoughts all over again…

Each night I pray, that God grant me the strength and courage to get on with another day. And each day I thought to myself, “I am a survivor”…surviving all these crap once again… I pray that, the good Lord send some omen that would lead me to the path I am rightfully to take. Whatever it is, will it be rocky, and stormy, as long as it is for me…I would gladly take it…just let me know if it is for me…just tell, it’s right to be me…

Don’t detest me, or judge me… I’m still young…and confused…and scared… trying to know what I want… trying to know who I am…trying to be WHO I am…

IMAGES

Disclaimer: photo not mine.

The better image of a person radiates upon the light they emanate when everything around them is dark…

People have different images for us, and we strike different poses for them. Some people smile in front of a camera to project a happy image…some kink their nose, raise their eyebrows, or pout their lips to come out unique and funny. Everyone vies for a good capture…who wants to gaffe in a camera pic anyway?? Although we love seeing bloopers, and we laugh at them…when a camera lights flash, we always attempt to project the better side of us.

In life, people have expectations of us. In their expectations, sometimes we fall short and sometimes we step up big. In our society, they expect us to behave properly, and we sometimes follow the norms either consciously or unconsciously. While some people wanted to be different and just be crazy, trip in the mirth of breaking rules, and top up the fun with society hoots.

When we bluff the real image just to feed in people’s expectations of us, we never appreciate the real beauty of the picture. Instead we always try to evaluate the beauty that is too well hidden in the mask of perfect pretensions.

In life’s photographs, it is never a necessity to come up polished and perfect. What people look in the photo is the real image behind the capture…the unseen behind the scene…or may be the mystery that we try so hard to decipher…

When we decide to disclose our self with people, do we choose to reveal the real us? Or allow the mystery to creep in and let them discovery the real clarity from within?

IN MY WORLD...

photo credits: DeviantArt

In my world,

There’s a little haven of a dreamer…

Of stories kept untold…

And of words left unspoken…

In my world,

There’s a small corner of solitude,

Of silence and comfort…

Where dreaming is easier alone…

In my world,

I write the songs of my heart…

On which the ears of my soul listen…

Singing the melody of my life…

In my world,

There’s a messed-up place…

A place where nobody cares…

Where I can be me…

Free of prejudices and make-believe…

In my world,

There’s a hollow space…

Filled up by memories of the past…

And of experiences from the future…

Of lessons learned, and regrets earned…

In my world,

There are vivid characters…

Playing the stories of their life…

Playing their story with me…

Like a tangled yarn connected to each other…

Each weaving their own stories to tell…

And I am into it…and they are into mine…

In my world,

There’s an open window…

Facing the horizon as it changes its colors…

Looking forward to new beginnings…

Uncertain of bitter endings…

Like the mighty rays of sunrise…

Or the distant melancholy of a sunset…

In my world,

There’s a healer…

Healing the wounds of a sinister

Healing the hearts that have been broken…

Comforting the lost and nonbeliever…

In my world,

I have a Savior, a Friend… Brother… a Father…

Always ready to listen, to heal…

He is the light on my darkest hours…

My companion in my sorrows…

My strength when I am weakened by my imperfections…

My voice when I am muted by my apprehension…

The eyes that allow me to see beyond my vision…

The wind beneath my scarred wings

The oasis of my cruel desert…

The warmth amidst the cold lonely breeze…

In my world,

There is a dreamer…

A little girl with various emotions

A woman in vague colors…

Someone imperfect and emotional…

Someone, though sometimes unworthy, is always forgiven…

YOU DON’T KNOW

Disclaimer: photo not mine.

Why do we allow people to dictate which image should we pose? Do they even know the depth of our souls? Do they even know the pain behind each tear we shed? Do they even feel the emptiness that creeps in when the lights are off? Do they even walk the dark streets alone? Do they know the heartbreaks that line the scars of my hope?

Nobody knows how to be me… and nobody cares whether I know the real me… where can you find yourself when you’re lost? How do you go back home when the tunnel is doomed? How can you make corrections to the wrong decisions you made?

Is happiness limitless? Or does it have boundary?